Have you ever been anxiously awaiting a package to arrive in the mail? You know, you run out everyday and check the box a few times, maybe a little earlier than usual, just too see, just in case the delivery person was new or something and had done the route backwards and thus magically hit your house first today. Yep. This is pretty much how I am feeling on a daily (and even nightly) basis here at the farm.
As you may or may not know, I have two VERY pregnant Nigerian dwarf goats that I honestly believe if I took a pin too, would pop immediately. AND, on top of that excitement, I have 5 massive chickens that should begin actually laying eggs at any given moment. So, waking up for me each morning has been a cauldron of emotions to say the very least. Pretty sure I go from the "innocent childlike" excitement that a Christmas morning might incite, to some form of the 5 stages of grief in 5 seconds, or less.
I guess one of the fun parts of waiting on the goats to deliver is that it's sorta like a "company bonus" in that you know it's coming, but you have no idea what "it" really is, or how much. Did I mention that goats can have up to 4 babies at one time? So, let us multiply that by 2 and we are looking at the possibility of 8. 8 little goat-lings running around and demanding their bottles (12 a day each) to be exact. However, judging by the looks of it, if I had to guess, Story, our petite little tri-color is only carrying 1 kid, whereas her poor twin sister Eve, has been graced with at least 2, my guess being 3 (she looks like one of those super-sized "Walmart" marshmallows that someone only lightly roasted in sporadic tan-ish spots.) That or a pillow pet with long legs.
At any rate, watching her "waddle" around the yard, and ESPECIALLY attempting to climb up or down stairs proves to be extremely amusing to say the least. While, at the same time, I will admit it is a little taxing. Yes on her obviously, but also on me. No not the stairs, but the pregnancies nearing their ends. And in that I mean I know I am "The Tethered Goat" and all, but I am most definitely feeling like it these days. I can't go anywhere. I must keep vigilant watch for any signs of a "baby incoming". Trips to the grocery store have become stressful (YES even MORE stressful than they already were with a 4 year old boy in tow).
Speaking of stress, apparently I am not even safe from it at night as I sleep. I have crazy dreams. For example, I was sound asleep the other night, and I suddenly shot straight up JUST SURE that I had heard a goat scream. So I did one of those "jump out of bed summersault across the floor and race for the door" moves that I am sure some of us remember from our "school-age days". I was about halfway across the yard before coming too and realizing that it was a still, silent, cold night (or in school-language SATURDAY.) When will it end?
Now you might be thinking, these are goats. They are intuitively built to just give birth unassisted, CALM THE F DOWN. And in most cases you would be completely right. However, when it is a goat's first time giving birth (called a freshening) it is more common for there to be complications. And by "complications" I mean the kind that require help that I will not go into too much detail about, only offer up that this "help" entails gloves (and tiny hands) at the ready... use your imagination.
Today I am making the longest trek that I have had to make since coming this close to "the end". My mother was visiting us from Virginia and while I am not driving her back to VIRGINIA per say, it might as well be. The airport, a 90 minute total, cross-country seeming excursion during which I AM JUST SURE that Eve will give birth. Famous last words right?
Wrong. I got back to things looking pretty much exactly the way I left them, minus the food that I could have SWORN I had just fed to my two apparently very hungry gestating goats. So, I guess I will busy myself making a fresh batch of Organic-single-malt-mustard, which I will be sampling (for quality purposes of course) in copious amounts in hopes that I just might be able to get a decent nights sleep...
sigh.
Just look at these bellies
I really really wish I could be there and since I can't I am very thankful for these postings!
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